


Throbbing Manhood

by squilf



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Based on a Tumblr Post, Bittersweet, Fluff, M/M, very silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-02
Updated: 2019-06-02
Packaged: 2020-04-06 18:47:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19068502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/squilf/pseuds/squilf
Summary: Aziraphale’s taste in books apparently includes trashy romance novels about angel and demon lovers.





	Throbbing Manhood

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little one-shot, inspired by [this Tumblr post](https://benisasoftboi.tumblr.com/post/185291283180/you-know-something-i-really-like-about-crowley-and) about how _Good Omens_ sounds like the plot of a trashy romance novel.

 

“What’s this?” Crowley says.

There’s always a pile of books on the table by Aziraphale’s sofa, but one’s caught his eye. It’s a shabby-looking paperback, well-worn, with a cracked spine. On the cover is an illustration of an embracing winged couple, wearing gossamer-thin robes that seem to be mostly falling off them. The man is dressed in black to match his wings; the woman in snowy white. Crowley picks it up and studies the title. _The Demon’s Lover_ by Cassandra Clarke.

“What?” says Aziraphale, from around the corner somewhere.

“This book you’re reading,” he says.

“I own a bookshop, dear,” Aziraphale says, coming over, “I read a lot of books.”

“How many about star-crossed angel and demon lovers?” Crowley says, absently waving the book at him.

The tips of Aziraphale’s ears turn pink. Crowley can’t put into words just how much he loves seeing that.

“You know I love a romance,” Aziraphale says.

“Mmm,” Crowley hums, flipping through the pages disinterestedly.

He lands on a section that looks particularly interesting and starts to read aloud.

“Arella took him in her arms and kissed him, her bosom heaving. Beneath Cassiel’s flowing robes she could feel his throbbing manhoo–”

“Give that back,” Aziraphale says imperiously, holding his hand out.

Crowley does not give it back.

“Isn’t this sacrilegious?” he says.

“The Almighty created sex,” Aziraphale says.

Crowley pulls a face.

“Oh no,” he says, “It just sounds wrong when you say _sex_. You should call it _love-making_ or… or _shenanigans_.”

Crowley turns back to the book, his eyes widening as he reads further along.

“And you _certainly_ shouldn’t be reading this filth.”

Aziraphale sighs.

“I shouldn’t be speaking to you, but here we are.”

He leans over and tries to grab the book. Crowley’s too quick for him, jerking the book away without even glancing in his direction. Aziraphale lands awkwardly on his lap.

“Careful,” Crowley says, “From down there you might be able to feel _my_ throbbing –”

Aziraphale grabs for the book again, practically launching himself into Crowley’s chest. He straightens himself out, his face suddenly very close.

“Give it back,” Aziraphale repeats.

Crowley grins, and promptly tosses the book over his shoulder.

“Oops.”

Aziraphale narrows his eyes at him. Then he climbs over him, leaning over the back of the sofa to reach for the book.

“You know you could just –” Crowley says, just before the whole sofa tips backwards and sends them crashing onto the floor.

Aziraphale lands half on top of him, half snuggled into his side. Crowley is on his back, with something digging into him. He winces as he pulls it out. It’s the book, looking a little crumpled.

“Does it have a happy ending?” he asks.

“I don’t think so,” Aziraphale says, and he sounds a little sad, “An angel and a demon surely couldn’t end well.”

“Maybe not in real life,” Crowley says, “But this is fiction.”

Crowley opens the book where he can see a bookmark, about three-quarters of the way through. One of his arms is tucked around Aziraphale’s shoulders, and when he holds the book up to read, he brackets them both in.

“Care to find out?” he says.

Aziraphale smiles.

“I’d like that.”


End file.
